Wayne Christ

I’m currently watching the Champions League semi-final match between Manchester United and Bayern Munich.

Now, this isn’t a post all about football, so don’t be put off. It’s more about one specific player, Mr. Wayne Rooney. Last Tuesday, Wayne Rooney suffered an injury to his ankle, and hobbled off the pitch. People worried that he might miss the World Cup in the summer. However, we were reassured that it wasn’t that serious, and he’d only be out for two to three weeks.

Now, eight days later, he is on the starting line-up against Bayern Munich.

Bull. Shit.

There is no way, no matter who you are, that you could recover from an ankle injury that quickly.

The only explanation that I have found is that Wayne Rooney is in fact Jesus Christ, risen again. It’s an Easter miracle!

But seriously, it’s clear that Manchester United have told some porkies here just to make it look like Wayne Christ can do anything, even defy the laws of biology!

Well it seems to be working because they’ve just gone 3-0 up before half time. (HAHA SCRATCH THAT: 3-1).

Right, that’s it for football talk.

Cheerio!

-S